Part 3: Something’s Happening
An original screenplay
This is Part 3 of a five-part screenplay. If you haven’t read the first two parts, click here — otherwise continue reading below:
Day 3: EXT — DOWNTOWN MIDDLEBERG, noon time:
MICKEY MOSKAVITZ1 runs up street with briefcase.
Close up watch dial, fast action. Stops on five-to-twelve.
Dial pulls away to reveal revolving door.
Normal speed: MICKEYl enters door.
First try: four attractive women enter from inside. MICKEYl spins round and round, gaping at them. Women exit as —
Second try: four senior citizens enter from inside, moving slowly. MICKEYl slams his head on glass. almost falls —
Third try: four POLICE OFFICERS enter from inside. spinning door foster, MICKEYl staring at them round and round —
Fourth try: four businessmen enter from inside. MICKEYl spins round, very fast —
MICKEY2 enters from outside, two MICKEYS spinning, looking at each other.
MICKEY2 stares at briefcase. is flung back out onto street, MICKEYl flung out and onto the checkerboard bistro floor —
INT — BISTRO DINING ROOM:
MICKEYl barrels out, dropping briefcase. which skims across tiling.
Track case across flooring, into feet of waitress.
She clicks heals together, Dorothy style: pan up aproned body, zoom lips:
LINDA
Mickey Moskavitz! Mickey Moskavitz? Mi-ckey Moska-vitz! (Pause) How dare you come into this place after all that we’ve been through — after all that’s been said and done — after all the time it took me to finally get over you — and look, I finally get over you — but between us something is always happening!
MICKEYl
(finger in air)
Uh… can I have a table-please?
LULU
No respect for my feelngs! Hah! For an “artist” you never could express yourself — you never treated me with the dignity that I deserved — you didn’t bother to take me out — or do things with me — you never included me with you and your friends — who I hated anyway —
MICKEYl rolls eyes, tries looking other way:
LULU
— And every time you come back! Don’t you? Look at you! After all you put me through — you just waltz right back into my life! (Pause, change in tone) — but I guess I’m happy to see you — I guess I even missed you —
LULU gazes down, starts to cry. LULU rushes toward bathroom.
Panoramic shot: dining room, PATRONS looking up, heads turning in unison to watch LULU.
Eyes then fixate on MICKEYl, who lifts up briefcase, raises finger again:
MICKEYl
Table? (clears throat) Can I have a table?
MICKEYl looks at watch, raps it, tap tap tap. Sounds of despair continue off-screen from ladies’ bathroom.
DAY 7: INT — MOSKAVITZ HOUSE, KITCHEN:
MINNIE MOSKAVllZ, preparing meal. Overhead shot revealing dirty water up to MINNIE’s ankles, smashed dishes, bent pots and pans in corner, small, portable stove, tiny propane nozzle lit, glowing dull blue.
VOICE OF MANNY
(yelling loudly from another room)
Lunch? Do we have any lunch here? Lunch! I spend all morning fixing things, so I want some lunch! Lunch! Where’s my lunch?
MINNIE
In a minute, in a minute already! You never like to eat out, so, I’m making you some lunch.
VOICE OF MANNY
Lunch! Are you hard of hearing? I make the lights come on like God, and I can’t even get a little something to eat! — Look what we are left with after that fire!
Machine breakdown sounds:
VOICE OF MANNY
(screaming above din)
Goddamn it! You were supposed to do everything, you machine, so you might as well go ahead and throw dirt on my grave, too.
More clanking, foot kicking metal, lights flicker, go out.
VOICE OF MANNY
God made us, and we, in our arrogance and stupidiy, made you, you stinking grease box! God screwed us up, so I’m not too surprised that you are even more worthless than your creators! Minnie! I might as well eat, now that we are in the darkness! I might as well eat, now that our grave has opened up again! Lunch! Where’s the lunch!? I want to die with at least some food on the table!
MINNIE
(softer, talking to herself)
All I ever wanted was a family, and happiness, happiness for me and my family. I suffered so much in my youth, during that terrible war, but I felt it
would be nothing when I would finally be in America, and have my own family. We are here, but where has the love gone to? I see my family, but it doesn’t seem real to me. I suffer now, as I did as a little girl, not knowing any better. Now I know better, and the pain is even worse. Who has taken all the love away?
VOICE OF MANNY
This place is a mess! A dark mess! Don’t make a bigger one in there: a mess! do you hear me, Minnie? A goddamned dark mess! Everything.
DAY 3: INT — BISTRO KITCHEN:
Slow motion tracking of ketchup bottle in free-fall — bottle is caught by large Mexican grill cook KOOKIE, then placed back on LUCY’s tray.
LUCY
(surprised, smiling)
I guess they don’t call you ·speedy” for nothing!
PERRITO, thin, short grill cook with hat hanging over eyes:
PERRITO
“Speedy” — Yeah, I heard that from his ugly woman.
KOOKIE
(blowing LUCY a kiss)
Anything for my bonita. I save you! I save you from yourself, okay?
LUCY
(picking up a tray of food)
Oh, don’t do that — then how could I enjoy you?
PERRITO
I heard that from his ugly woman, in bed.
KOOKIE
(bowing low)
I give you the answer to everything, by showing you how to stop asking questions, mi amor. Follow only me. I will guide you.
LUCY
Whoever said I ask? I only take — and who said follow, I only lead, eh compadre?!
PERRITO
I heard that, from his ugly wo-man, in his ugly woman’s, soft pretty bed.
KOOKIE
My Lucy cannot ask, take, follow or lead, because I know her name is not Lucy, but Roxanne —
PERRITO rings serving bell, BiiiiiiinnnnNNNG!
INT — BISTRO DINING ROOM, moments later:
Track LUCY bringing out tray of deli sandwiches to MICKEYl‘s table.
MICKEYl, wearing plaid shirt, sitting with Suburban Princess Type:
LUCY
If I can get anything else for you, just let me know.
MICKEYl
Another splash of coffee, will you please?
LUCY
(turning away, judgemental face)
No problem.
Tense pause.
MICKEYl
Uh… Do you like art?
DATEl
I want to get married. I want to get married to a man of means, a professional man. I want to get married to a professional man, and live in a large, comfortable house. I want to marry an executive or a doctor, live in a mansion by the lake, and have children. I want to marry a company president or a brain surgeon, live in a mansion by the sea, and have two children, a boy and a girl. Their names will be Stanley and Rebecca. Or Mark and Rachel. I have yet to decide, but I’m getting closer, you understand? I’m getting closer.
MICKEYl, head bent over sandwich, staring at her.
DATEl
I want all these things, these things, and more. Can you supply me with these things? And more? You see, I’ve reached the point in my life where I know exactly what I want — now it just comes down to getting it. I only go out with prospective pre-qualified candidates. That’s right: I screen men. Sure, they have to be cute, and kind, and courteous, and courageous, but if they aren’t exactly what I’m looking for —
Close up PERRITO’s open hand striking meal bell. Biiiinnngg!
FX: Extreme close up Reuben sandwich. Ingredients, fat content, cholesterol levels all written in small computer style print, matted onto frame.
KOOKIE calls out order, wipes counter, bell resonates:
KOOKIE
Reuben Sandwich! Reuben! Pick it up or pick it out! Reuben Sandwich! Reuben! Z
Zoom in to KOOKIE’s mouth, wide open-instant super zoom straight inside…
DAY 4: INT — BISTRO DINING ROOM:
LUCY
(different hair style)
If I can get anything else for you, just let me know.
MICKEYl in button down shirt, seated with Pathetic Secretary Type.
MICKEYl
Another splash of coffee, will you please?
LUCY
(turning away, making another face)
No problem.
Tense pause.
MICKEYl
…Are you sensitized to art?
DATE2
I only go out with good looking guys. All my boy friends have been very handsome. I would never date anyone else. You have to assert yourself, you know? If you want something, then you have to reach out and just take it! No one gets the better of me, because I don’t let them!
MICKEYl, staring dully at DATE2.
DATE2
(her eyes crossing slightly)
My last boyfriend was a grave digger. Not that bright, you know, but he looked good! My boyfriend before that was handsome, too. A real professional man! He didn’t treat me that right though.
DATE2 bites a nail, nerously toys with silverware.
DATE2
(continuing, now more urgently)
He didn’t treat me right. I stuck with him, because he looked good, I told you he looked good, didn’t I? Romance and art! To think that someone would be so madly in love with me as to want to marry me after only a week drove me wild! You should treat people right, you know. You should. They should. Should I? Art!
DATE2 looks about frantically.
DATE2
Look at this fork. It’s grimy! Waitress! Waffress! How can she put such a dirty fork out!? Look at this setting! And the food! Oh my God! The food! How could they even serve something like this? How can a place like this stay in business —
Close up PERRITO’s open palm striking meal bell Biiiinnngg!
FX: extreme close up of Beef Brisket Sandwich. Clinical definition of a psychosis, written in small textbook style print, matted onto side of frame.
KOOKIE wiping counter. calling order. bells still sounding:
KOOKiE
Beef brisket sandwich! Brisket! Slide it in or slide it out! Brisket Sandwich! Brisket!
Close up KOOKIE’s mouth. wide open. looks like he might have a gold tooth, then zoom insid…
DAY 5: INT — BISTRO DINING ROOM:
LUCY
(different hair style)
If I can get anything else for you, just let me know.
MICKEYl, in fancy dress shirt, with Female Punker From Hell.
MICKEYl
Another splash of coffee, will you please?
LUCY
(turning away, making another face)
No problem.
Tense pause.
DATE3 blows cigarette into MICKEYl’s face.
MICKEYl
You must be (gasping slightly) into art —
DATE3
I’m completely open minded to art. Censorship is fascism, man. It’s Nazi shit pulling records from shelves, labeling tunes, banning cuts, you know what I’m saying? I read a book that said “RCA” was used by medieval warlocks as a code name for the Antichrist. People are out of their heads.
DATE3 blows more smoke into MICKEYl’s face.
DATE3
(talking loudly, leaning, eye-to-eye)
I’m totally selective, man. I don’t listen to 99% of the crap that’s out there. Most people don’t know jack about art, and that’s a fact. People should get educated. People freak out that a record could be played backwards and Satanic shit will stream out in torrents. Damn straight! That’s exactly how you affect people, man, you know what I’m saying? Everything else is pop musack fluff, is teeny-bopper bimbo bullshit, you got me? Time to wisen up! Everything else is —
Close up PERRITO’s open palm striking meal bell. Biiiinnngg
FX: extreme close up Pastrami Sandwich: listing of Pop Top Forty written in small Billboard magazine style print matted onto frame.
Wiping down counter, KOOKIE calls out order, as bell resonates:
KOOKIE
Hot Pastrami sandwich! Pastrami! Grill it, spill it, drill it, then swill it! Pastrami sandwich! Pastrami!
Close up KOOKIE’s mouth wide open, zoom straight inside. into vast darkness…
DAY 6: INT — BISTRO DINING ROOM:
LUCY
(different hair style)
If I can get anything else for you, just let me know.
MICKEYl. wearing shirt, tie. is seated with DATE4, a stunningly attractive redhead in a bright red. flowing dress.
MICKEYl
A smother flash of coffins. will you tease?
LUCY
(turning away, eyebrows raised)
Prob-lem —
Several moments of nervous breakdown silence:
LILY
Whatever made you want to become an artist?
MICKEYl
Oh! Uh-1 guess I’ve always wanted to get away from it all. So much of everyday life is just so boring and stupid. So many people are terrible. just dead inside. I figured that with my art I could get into something real, real people, some people with true feelings, who make themselves a meaningful part of this world — Does that make any sense?
LILY
Uh huh. I like art with passion. True art- Passionate art. Do you like that kind of art. too? Are you passionate about passion. Mickey Moskavitz?
MICKEYl
If you ask me. that’s the only kind of art there is!
LILY
Passion. And feeling.
MICKEYl takes her hand. and looks into her eyes. mesmerized:
MICKEYl
You’re right! Too much of the scene these days is too heady! They don’t tap into their emotions enough. (shaking head, sighing) Critics. It all becomes one big intellectual masturbation trip.
LILY
Do you do that?
MICKEYl
Do I like what?
LILY
You know — Touching yourself.
MICKEYl turns beat red, looks down nervously, squirms.
MICKEYl
I have to say that you are the most interesting person I’ve ever met.
LILY
You don’t have to say it. Just say it.
MICKEYl
You are the most interesting person I’ve ever met.
LILY
(leaning back slightly)
Do you find me attractive?
MICKEYl
Yes.
LILY
(leaning forward slightly)
Do you find me sexy?
MICKEYl
Uh- oh-yes-yes, yes — of course.
LILY
(crossing her arms across chest)
Then tell me, Mr. Artist — what is the difference between attractive — and sexy?
MICKEYl
(rapidly)
What do you mean? How do you mean it? In an aesthetic sense? In a critical sense? In a postmodern sense? In a deconstructive sense? In a sensuous sense?
LILY
In a nonsense sense!
LILY throws up arms, head back, laughing.
MICKEYl starts to laugh, LILY stops — MICKEYl notices, stops — LILY starts again — MICKEYl starts again — LILY stops, MICKEYl lagging behind her, self-conscious, LILY noticeably in command.
LILY
What would it be like to be in love with me?
MICKEYl
Excuse me?
LILY
No excuses! And no complaining, either! Do you think you would like it? Do you think you would like sleeping with me?
MICKEYl
(pausing, thinking, then — )
What would be the difference between loving you and sleeping with you?
LILY
Oooh! I like you! I really do! I think that you know exactly where I’m coming from!- Do you think you know me that well already, Mickey Moskavitz? Do you think you know me well enough to sleep with me — to love me, even?
LILY looks past MICKEYl, thinking, lost in herself:
LILY
(in a distant, dazed voice)
… Mickey. Mickey Moskavitz. Mi-ckey. Mi-ckey Moska-vitz, Mickey, Mickey Moskavitz …
MICKEYl
Uh, yeah — Uh, uh, uh I couldn’t say. I suppose I would have to s-s-s-s-s-sleep with you first.
LILY
(fake disappointment, pouty voice)
And what about the love? What about the passion?
MICKEYl
Don’t you know? Don’t you sense? Haven’t you yet noticed? There’s passion all around.
LILY
(lfftle girl voice)
Passion all around? Mickey Moskavitz says that there’s passion all around! Passion all around! Do you hear him? How wonderful! Can everyone hear him? Mickey Moskavitz says that there’s passion all around. all a-round. all a-round passion, passion. passion all around!
Cut to MICKEY2. seated at a booth.
LUCY leans close as she pours coffee, whispering, pointing.
Cut back to…
MICKEYl
You just have to be sensitized to it. that’s all. You can find it in the most unlikely of places. too. In some of the most obvious of places. sure — but only when you least expect to find it!
LILY
(seductively)
Independence Day, fireworks tonight. you know.
MICKEYl
Is that a hint?
LILY
I don’t know. Isn’t everything a hint when there’s passion all around?
MICKEYl
Would you come with me to the river? Would you come with me to the river to see the fireworks?
LILY
Timing! Don’t you know anything about timing? How can you romance, my little artist, if you don’t have your timing down? How can you do art, my little romancer. if you can’t tell the time?
MICKEYl
(looking at his watch)
Do you mean I have to wait?
LILY
Expectantly.
MICKEYl
Can I have your number?
LILY
Let me write it down for you. Call me, and then you can meet me by the river.
LILY unsuccessfully searches for pen in red purse.
MICKEYl can’t find one either. as LUCY delivers check.
MICKEY1 opens briefcase. removes art brush.
MICKEYl pours ketchup onto napkin. dabs brush into it to LILY’s amusement.
Close up of bill, MICKEY1 writing on it with ketchup.
VOICE OF LILY
Twenty-two, twenty-two, three-one-six.
DAY 7: INT — MOSKAVllZ KITCHEN:
MINNIE chopping vegetables, then pours them into skillet.
VOICE OF MANNY
(yelling above the sizzle)
Where’s lunch! When will I finally have my lunch? When will I finally get to eat?
Extreme close up sizzling vegetables, spatula moving through them.
Sound of MINNIE crying.
DAY 6: INT — BISTRO DINING ROOM, moments later:
Close up bill, ketchup writing.
Feminine hand suddenly sweeps bill up.
MICKEYl jumps from seat. chases after bill.
MICKEYl chasing after LULU, LULU flapping bill behind her.
LULU
(calling out over her shoulder)
Lucy must have given you the wrong bill. This is for one of my customers. Wrong bill!
Comical long range shot MICKEYl chasing LULU around tables, PATRONS watching them go.
LILY discreetly exits.
MICKEYl
(repeating to himself)
Twenty-two, twenty-two, three-one-six.
MICKEY2 approaches emptied booth, searches MICKEYl’s briefcase, finds a racing ticket stub.
Close up: on back penciled series of numbers, for a combination.
MICKEY2 pockets ticket.
Close up PERRITO’s open hand striking meal bell. Biiiinnngg!
FX: Extreme close up of stuffed cow intestine. Matted onto side of frame, in small newspaper print letters. is classified singles page from Middleberg newspaper.
KOOKIE wipes down counter, calling out:
KOOKIE
Kishke guts! Kishkel Rough ·em. stuff ’em, don’t look at ‘em, then eat ·em! Kishke guts! Kishke guts!
Close up KOOK’s mouth, zoom inside…
DAY 6: INT — SUPERMARKET AISLE, early afternoon:
Track shelf of generic foods. stop at face of MARTY MARTINS (DRIVER from before), dead ringer for MICKEYl.
MARTY pushes cart out of frame.
LILY pushes cart into frame.
LILY frowns at generic aisle.
LILY moves to next aisle, removes item.
Point of view through opening: MARTY on other side, facing camera, examining item just above line of sight.
LILY moves. Collision, LILY bumps into MARTY.
LILY
Oh, excuse me-
MARTY
Oh, that’s alright.
MARTY looks at her angrilly, then. noticing her beauty, smiles.
LILY
Mickey! I didn’t expect to see you here!
MARTY
(looking confused)
Mickey? I, don’t really know —
LILY
Oh, silly! You’re so shy! You know, you’re so cute when you’re shy!
Change in MARTY’S attitude, exaggerated gestures:
MARTY
Yeah, uh huh, that’s what they always say about me — Mickey, you know, Mickey — people come up to me and they say “Mick, why are you so damn shy?” and “Mick, you should loosen up!”
LILY
Why are you so damn shy? Loosen up!
MARTY
Uh… I… uh — I get shy around my pretty girifriend! It’s hard for me to loosen up when I get sooooooo —
LILY
Shy, but still n-n-n-naughty… (Pause) You know, seeing you like this — especially when you are dressed up so nice, with your hair all fixed up. new glasses — it makes me want to see you soon. sooner than we planned (leaning close to him) — so — (shrugging) whaddaya say?
MARTY
Sure! I mean, yeah, of course. right. Let’s meet sooner! Definitely! Let’s meet sooner — okay?
LILY
Passion! Hey: instead of meeting by the river like we said, why don’t you come by my house first? I live at 63 Carondelet Street. Can you remember that? Come over at eight-thirty.
MARTY
Yeah, sure, I can remember that. “63 Carondelet Street. Eight-thirty.”
LILY
Good little Mickey! (waves) See you!
MARTY
See you!
hey wave more, giggle foolishly, push carts in opposite directions.
Angle LILY: contemplative, scheming.
Angle MARTY: looks stunned, confused. then smiles.
INT — SUPERMARKET, CHECK-OUT LINES, moments later:
“Real” MICKEY1, carrying too many items to lines. He drops some, finally gets to conveyor, plops them down.
MICKEYl
(wiping brow)
Phew!
SUPERMARKET CASHIER
We have carts, you know.
MICKEYl
Yeah, I know, but I figured I could carry it all.
SUPERMARKET CASHIER
You had a cart last time.
MICKEYl
Huh?
SUPERMARKET CASHIER
Forget something?
MICKEYl
No, just came for couple things I really need.
SUPERMARKET CASHIER
Usually, those are the things we forget.
MICKEYl
Huh?
SUPERMARKET CASHIER
Where’s your girlfriend?
MICKEYl
Which one?
SUPERMARKET CASHIER
Oh, pooh! You know, the red head, waiting in the other line just a couple minutes ago, the one you kept giving serious goo-goo eyes to — Cute cute cute: nothing but trouble, though! Let me tell you, nothing but trouble, trouble, trouble, trouble!
MICKEY l
Lily! How did you — how could you have — ?
SUPERMARKET CASHIER gives MICKEYl a once-over:
SUPERMARKET CASHIER
Usually, people dress up for a date.
MICKEYl
I’m not on a date! I’m just at the grocery store!
SUPERMARKET CASHIER smiles at MICKEYl.
MICKEYl looks up at ceiling, down at shoes. then at box of generic cookies.
He pushes them in front of SUPERMARKET CASHIER, taps them nervously.
DAY 6: INT — MIDDLEBERG POLICE STATION, late evening:
Extremely messy office area, similarly disheveled POLICE OFFICERS:
OFFICER STOLI SCRIBOWSKI
(Slavic accent, eating a hot dog)
Hey. fuckos, Have you guys seen that mad scientist bozo they called in from central? I figure he’s the new forensics expert, but I think the guy looks like he could sure use a blow job. if you ask me.
OFFICER MICKEY O’McMICKSON
(Irish accent, reading newspaper)
Who asked you, Stoli? You gonna give him one to make the commissioner happy?
SCRIBOWSKI
Why don’t you give the commissioner one yourself, O’McMickson, and leave out the middle man?
O’McMICKSON
Why don’t you just give me one, Scribowski, and then we don’t have to worry about the brass?
SCRIBOWSKI
You play trumpet, Mick? I didn’t know you blew your own horn.
OFFICER SANTOS SCATALONI
(Neopolitan accent, interrogating THE KID)
Shut up Polack! You — Hey! Shut up Mick! You — I got some work to finish, then I go visit your mother.
SCRIBOWSKI and O’McMICKSON in unison:
Hey! Hey! Hey! — Shut. Up. Dago. Shithead!
OFFICER DAVIE DUNT
(monotone, smoking, staring dully ahead)
. . . If I live or if I die, makes no difference to me, so long as I live in dignity, live without fear. I know how things work, I know all the things that I’ll never have, all the things I can never do. That’s my life, I’ll just deal with it, since that’s all I can do, that’s all any guy can ever do…
THE KID is sitting opposite SCATALONI.
THE KID
(Pointing to OFFICER DUNT) Yo, chief! Who’s the psycho cop over there?
SCATALONI
Never mind him, kid, don’t pay any attention. (Leans close to THE KID) That’s Officer Davie Dunt. The only thing he hates more than being a cop is being alive. He’s just like Dirty Harry, only he ain’t, cause he’s Davie Dunt: But that’s about the only difference.
THE KID
Wow! Does he shoot people? Does he pack a .44?
SCATALONI
(leaning back)
He only shoots little punks who ask too many fucken questions. I ask the questions, you got that? (leaning close again, whispering) But let me give you some advice, okay? Whatever you do (pointing to DUNT), don’t let him start interrogating you, you understand me? You’re lucky. you little punk rat, that I got to you first, you got it?
THE KID
Wow! Uh, what — I mean — what would he do if he started asking questions?
SCATALONI
You little snot-nosed miscarriage from the Holy Virgin!- You comic book frito eating fucko! Didn’t I tell you that I was asking the fucken questions?You got some type of a problem? You rash, you hemorrhage, you baby junior pisshead?
THE KID
No, I, uh —
Phone rings.
SCATALONI
(picks up phone, to KID) Don’t move (into phone) Hello, Middleberg Police Headquarters, Officer Santos Scataloni, what the fuck can I do for you?… A fire?- Where?… No. Why? Go call the fire department. No. This is the po-lice, so go call the Micks at the fucken fire station… What?…
DUNT gestures to THE KID.
THE KID goes to DUNT’s desk.
SCATALONI
(into telephone)
What? A fire, yeah, you already told me that twenty fucken times… What? Someone was running out? after the family ran out? What? Yeah, I figure it’s not too surprising that someone should be runnin out of a burning house, you stupid.
DUNT
(to THE KID, now sffting in front of DUNT)
…I’ve been through a lot, I’ve seen many stranger things, oh ho. You can ask me if I learned something, if I’m a “better person,” if, after all that pain, suffering, terror and alienation, that I have become stronger, more capable, that I feel proud of myself, have accomplished something. You can go ahead and ask me that, when all I can ever say is that I’m alive (sighs), still around, only to suffer more…
SCATALONI
(into telephone)
…What? The guy had a pantyhose on his fucken head?- Yeah, it’s standard procedure to send a unit over, we should have officers there soon- But I should take down your name, your number — just for the record. Who is this? What? Hello? Hello! Hello! What the- Hello? (slams phone down) The asshole hung up on me.
DUNT
(to THE KID)
…I’ve never asked for anything from anyone, and yet, no one seems to care. I keep doing my own thing, as the whole world keeps going on without me. Do I complain? Do I fight back? I only suffer.
SCATALONI
(to KID)
Get your ass back over here (to POLICE) Did you guys hear that? Somebody calls in a smokeout, and then hangs up in my fucken face!
SCRIBOWSKI
Yeah, surprising, since he didn’t even see your face.
KID walks back over to SCATALONl’s desk.
SCATALONI
(to SCRIBOWSKI)
Shut up, you.
O’McMICKSON
(in exaggerated old Irish accent)
Don’t worry, boys. Me brothers have been known to piss hotel fires out in the wee hours of the night.
Telephone ring again.
SCRIBOWSKI
(grabs phone)
Hello? Middleberg Police, Officer Stoli Scribowski, you kill ’em, we grill ’em — Yeah?
SCATALONI
(to KID)
I ask the questions! (Pause) Where you from?
THE KID
Middleberg.
SCATALONI
Bullshit! Where you from?
THE KID
Okay. Cleveland.
SCATALONI
That’s a lie. Where you from?
THE KID
Dayton.
SCATALONI
Really?
THE KID
Yeah? (fake grin).
SCATALONI
Listen, I’m gonna pop you one, you (pointing to OLD MAN, on bench). Is that old fart with you?
THE KID
No.
SCATALONI
He from Akron or some shit?
THE KID
Dunno. Ask him.
SCATALONI
I’m gonna wrap that skate board around your —
SCRIBOWSKI
(gently putting down receiver)
Hey, Boys!
All OFFICERS shout in unison:
Shut the fuck up!
SCRIBOWSKI
No no no! Seriously, guys, listen: That was Sergeant Snark. The commissioner wants details about that fire. He’s sending Snark and that goofy new forensics guy over right away.
O’McMICKSON
People burn all the time, what’s the big deal?
SCATALONI
(stands, puts cap on)
Come on, kid: bye-bye babies bye-bye… I catch you and the old geezer back in town, causing trouble, and both of you go flying assholes over shoelaces into the clink.
SCRIBOWSKI
(also getting up)
Don’t have a clue about this. boys, but Snark sounded steamed.
SCATALONI grabs THE KID and OLD MAN by collars, starts for door.
THE KID
Hey, grease ball.
SCATALONI
What?
THE KID
Where you takin us?
SCATALONI
Kiss Middleberg goodbye: Prison bus goes out to Cincie, and they’re gonna drop you there. So. no more cheap grifting. no more two bit scams.
THE KID
Hey. pastahead.
SCATALONI
Can’t you see I’m busy?
THE KID
(gesturing to DUNT)
He didn’t even ask me any questions…
SCATALONI
You’re lucky then.
THE KID
Hey. Mussolini with a big fucken beanie.
SCATALONI
You wanna go to Cincie. or you wanna die?
THE KID
Can I think about it a while?
SCATALONI
I’m gonna pound your lights out.
THE KID
Before you do that — can we talk a second?
SCATALONI stops, lowers THE KID.
SCATALONI
This had better be good.
THE KID
Oh, it’s good. really good. I got some information.
SCATALONI
Yeah?
THE KID
Yeah.
SCATALONI looks at OLD MAN.
OLD MAN nods.
SCATALONI
(to THE KID, gesturing to DUNT)
Are you sure he didn’t ask you any questions?
DAY 6: INT — LILY LANGER’S BEDROOM, late evening:
LILY stands next to dresser, removes drawer. Letters and cards tumble down across field of vision.
Overhead shot, paper tumbling onto quilted bed.
LILY searches through cards, finds one, then another. She puts them both next to each other on night table.
Pan across bedroom beginning with closed window, across to LILY bent over bed, stuffing papers back into drawer, neatening spread, ruffling up pillows…
Pan continuing past large, oval mirror, to night table, where two cards, one written in neat calligraphy on pinkish-red mocha, other with sloppy handwriting on prison paper rest open:
Oh Dearest Lilly,
Happy Independence Day!
Mickey Moskavitz
Yo, Lilly — what goes, babe?
See you by the Fourth!
Mickey Moskavitz
Pan continues along far wall, covered with many hats, finally to partially coagulated blood stains on wall, near closed closet door.
LILY hums tune, partially covering sounds of moaning.
INT — LANGER KITCHEN:
Fix on closed door pantry door. door opens.
Over shoulder, LILY’s MOTHER reaches for cookie cutter, one shaped like heart, another a clown’s head. Reaches, drops a flower shaped cutter.
Close up face of large grandfather clock, eight-thirty.
Visible mechanism behind glass: ticking. rapping.
INT — LILY’S BEDROOM:
Close up window handle.
Dolly outward: MALE FIGURE outside, LILY helps MICKEY2. covered in soot and grime, back into bedroom.
LILY
Mickey! Moskavitz! Mickey Moskavitz! Hey! Am I seeing double? Jail not good enough for you?
MICKEY2
Double-Trouble, when you least expect it, expect it.
LILY and MICKEY2 hug.
MICKEY2
Got any clean duds, Lily?
LILY notices soot. rushes to mirror.
MICKEY2 undresses in background as LILY cleans herself with tissues.
LILY
God! What happened to you tonight?
MICKEY2
None of your damn business.
LILY
Business? What do you know about business?
MICKEY2
Enough to know not to do any with you.
LILY
Are you calling me a whore?
MICKEY2
No. Only a bad fuck.
LILY smashes a pocket mirror against dresser. lunges at MICKEY2.
MICKEY2 grabs her, forces her to drop mirror.
They stand there. facing each other, MICKEY2 with hand lock on both of her wrists.
LILY
You play a dangerous game. mister.
MICKEY2
You’re the one who plays games. I’m the one who still works for a living. remember?
MICKEY2 tosses LILY to ground. where she falls beside small mirror.
LILY
How do you know I haven’t been working? And what? You call painting houses work?
MICKEY2
Beats painting cells.
LILY
Is that what you did for four years?
MICKEY2
When I wasn’t missing you.
LILY gets up slowly, slightly dazed, looks at him affectionately.
LILY
Did you really miss me?
MICKEY2
Only when I wasn’t painting cells.
LILY
How could you leave me, with nothing?
MICKEY2
What have I ever had, besides you? One bad pinch, and I lost even that. You at least got this house, and that screwy old lady of yours.
LILY
Don’t you insult her, you son of a —
MICKEY2
(rocking his head side-to-side)
Bitch-bitch-bitch-bitch-bitch.
LILY
(sharp, pouty)
Stop it.
MICKEY2 stares curiously at LILY.
LILY looks back into mirror.
Pause.
LILY
Did you really miss me?
MICKEY2
Maybe.
LILY
What do you mean, ‘maybe’?
MICKEY2
Maybe I did, and, maybe I didn’t.
LILY
Fuck you.
MICKEY2
Will you marry me?
LILY
My mother would never let me marry a rude, cruel, penniless, egomaniac jerk of a loser.
MICKEY2
Should I take that for a ‘yes’?
LILY
Take that for another ‘fuck you’.
MICKEY2
My family will be so happy to hear the news!
LILY
You don’t have a family.
MICKEY2
Then we’ll just have to invite your screwy old lady.
LILY
She’s not interested-
MICKEY2
Will you marry me, then?
LILY
Do you say everything twice?
MICKEY2
Do you say everything twice?
LILY
Stop teasing me!
MICKEY2
Stop teasing me!
LILY lunges for MICKEY2 again, they fall down together onto bed.
LILY and MICKEY 2 fight: he slaps, she scratches — after few moments their fighting leads into hugging and kissing.
LILY
You play a dangerous game. mister.
MICKEY2
Now who’s repeating?
LILY
You play a dangerous gane. mister. I could have mistaken you for someone else coming through my little window. knifed you —
LILY pokes finger at his abdomen. mimicking slashing motion.
LILY
Then locked you inside my bedroom closet… You wouldn’t have liked that, would you. Mickey dear?
MICKEY2
Yeah. you coulda done that, but then I wouldn’t have been able to give you your present.
MICKEY2 reaches into bag. removes red rose.
As he hands it to her. he slides rolled canvas under bed without her seeing.
LILY sniffs rose, turns off light.
EXT — FRONT PORCH OF LANGER HOUSE:
Close up shot of bugs flying around exposed bulb.
Pan down to head of MICKEY1, holding white rose, ringing bell.
MOTHER’S VOICE
(indeterminate European accent)
Who is it?
MICKEYl
Uh, it’s Mickey. Mickey Moskavitz — Lily’s friend.
MOTHER’S VOICE
Mickey Moskavitz Lily’s friend? What do you want?
MICKEYl
I’m here to take Lily out on a date.
MOTHER’S VOICE
A date?! Are you out of your mind?
MICKEYl
My house almost burned down tonight. but I think I’m okay: I met Lily In the Gallery.
MOTHER’S VOICE
Have you found a job since you got out?
MICKEYl
Yeah, I’m working in Mort’s clothing store.
MOTHER’S VOICE
That bookie joint front! Your own boss will be furious!
MICKEYl
He’s always furious. I needed a job.
MOTHER’S VOICE
Painting not good enough for you, Moskavitz?
MICKEYl
I need a job, so that I can paint.
MOTHER’S VOICE
Did them jailbirds screw your brains, too? Are you corrupted, mentally disturbed, worn out?
MICKEYl
I have a date with Lily, okay? Love transcends all, even art, you know.
Door is flung open.
LILY’S MOTHER (rather rotund) grabs MICKEY:
MOTHER
Oh! My mistake! My mistake! You must be the new boy Lilly told me about! I suppose the name confused me. Come in, you other Mickey, come in!
LILY’S MOTHER literally hurls MICKEYl into living room.
INT — LANGER LIVING ROOM:
MOTHER
Ohl For a second I thought you were someone else.
MICKEYl
For a while, I thought I was at the wrong house.
LILY’S MOTHER
Then come over, my little Micke — have a cookie/-
MOTHER shoves tray of cookies into MICKEYl ‘s face.
Close up tray: clown, heart, and flower shaped cookies.
MOTHER
Moskavitz? Mickey Moskavttz? What kind of a name is Mickey Moskovitz. you tell me?
MICKEYl
Family name. ma’am.
MOTHER pushes MICKEYl onto couch. near UGLY BABY’S cradle.
MOTHER
Have a seat, Micky. Please. make yourself comfortable, while I go on up and see how my Lily girl is doing. Here —
MOTHER gives MICKEYl rattle.
MOTHER
While you wait, you can play with Adolf here.
MICKEYl takes rattle, looks into cradle.
UGLY BABY inside.
Close up of UGLY BABY, very hideous and very fat, drooling, leering.
MOTHER
Isn’t he beautiful? Oh, so very beautiful?
UGLY BABY, scowling, pinched by MOTHER’s hand.
MICKEYl
Are you an imp, or what?
UGLY BABY makes gagging, burping, farting, drooling, and horrible goo-goo sounds.
Sofa creeks, grandfather clock ticks.
INT — LILY’S BEDROOM:
Darkened room, LILY and MICKEY2 making love on bed, sounds of rocking, creaking bed, then gentle knock on bedroom door.
LILY
(whispering urgently)
Shhhhh! My mother’s coming!
MICKEY2
I didn’t realize I could have such an effect.
MOTHER’S VOICE
Lily! You have another visffor downstairs! Lily!
MICKEY2
What is this, a convention? Some other friend of yours just get out, too?
LILY
(cupping hand over MICKEY2’s mouth)
Yes, momma! I’ll be out in a moment!
MICKEY2
(mumbling)
Yeah. But I guess I’ll have to be out first.
LILY puts another hand on MICKEY2’s mouth.
MICKEY2
(pushing both LILY’s hands away)
Be straight with me — What’s going on?
LILY
I don’t know! Turn the lights on and let’s find out!
Both off bed: LILY faces door, MICKEY2 goes about rapidly searching through his numerous bags.
LILY
You shouldn’t have come over here like you did. I was expecting you later. You weren’t fair to me, and now there’s a stink.
MICKEY2 finds fresh clothing in bag, grasps them rapidly.
MICKEY2
Right. Sorry I didn’t stay in the joint another four.
LILY
You know how momma doesn’t like you.
MICKEY2
I think she’s terrific — imagine the injustice in this world! (Pause) I’m getting outta here. Go play with your new boyfriend, whatever his name is.
LILY
“Mickey Moskavitz!”
MICKEY2
(rapidly dressing in clothes similar to MICKEY1‘s)
Never a dull moment while I was away?
LILY
It’s not like that at all. I don’t have a clue who’s downstairs. I should get dressed, though. (rubbing her legs) My stockings, I need my stockings.
MICKEY2
Where are they?
LILY
Closet. They’re in the closet, those filthy things.
MICKEY2 starts for closet, not noticing blood stains.
INT — LIVING ROOM:
MOTHER
(pullng rattle away from MICKEY1)
Don’t over-do it.
MICKEYl
Huh?
MOTHER
Don’t spoil the child.
MICKEYl
I was only playing.
MOTHER
Would you like some coffee?
MICKEYl
Too late for that.
MOTHER
Keep you up?
MICKEYl
I’ve had a traumatic night already.
MOTHER
Do you want to feed the baby?
MICKEYl looks incredulously at MOTHER, then at UGLY BABY.
Close up UGLY BABY, drooling wickedly.
INT — LILY’S BEDROOM:
MICKEY2 opens closet, and BODY tumbles out, noisily strikes floor.
BODY is bloody, dressed all in black, face covered with pantyhose.
MICKEY2
Holy shit!
LILY
Ssh! Didn’t I tell you to keep your mouth shut? Neither one of you listen to me, neither one!
MICKEY2
Christ! I’m back in town less than a week, and everyone seems to be croaking on me!
LILY
You’re the only one for me, Mickey Moskavitz! Mickey Moskavitz, you’re the only one!
MICKEY2 steps away from BODY, and looks penetratingly at LILY.
MICKEY2
Don’t tell me you’re running hits for Willy again. Oh, shit, don’t tell me you’re working the night shift!
LILY
You’re not the only one who works for a living, champ. Remember?
MICKEY2
Just like the good old days, eh, Babe? (Pause) Did you do him first?
LILY
(takes rose, caresses thorns)
He couldn’t fool me! I wouldn’t let him fool either one of us, Mickey Moskavitz!
MICKEY2
Alright, who did you whack this time? What does this guy look like? Does he have an ID?
MICKEY2 pulls mask off of BODY.
They stare at MARTY.
MICKEY2
He looks slightly familiar to me, but I can’t place him. How’d you get him up here so slick? Give me the grease — Why’d Fat Willy have you whack him?
INT — STAIRCASE, JUST OUTSIDE LILY’S BEDROOM:
Sweeping pan of MICKEYl and LILY’S MOTHER both bolting up the stairs,
MICKEYl helping LILY’S MOTHER along.
INT — LILY’S BEDROOM:
LILY
All I ever wanted was you, Mickey Moskavitz! All I ever wanted was you! No one else but you!
Bedroom door bursts open.
MICKEYl and LILY’S MOTHER scramble inside, still holding hands, discover MICKEY2, LILY, and BODY.
Series of close ups on all faces: amazement. horror. shock.
LILY sees MICKEYl, and LILY screams, drops red rose.
MICKEYl drops white rose, spellbound.
MICKEY 1 and MICKEY2 stare confusedly at each other for instant.
Zoom three roses together on floor, all lying in pool of blood.
Sound of LILY’S horrific screaming, sobbing, more screaming.
EXT— WINDOW LEDGE, JUST OUTSIDE LILY’S BEDROOM:
Screaming continues. as MICKEY2 opens window rapidly, climbs out.
EXT —LANGER HOUSE LAWN:
MICKEY2 climbs down tree, jumps to ground, runs off into night.
Long shot of spectacular Independence Day fire works display, erupting over House.
Explosions combine with screams.
DAY 7: EXT — ROSEGARDEN BEHIND LANGER HOUSE, early morning:
MICKEYl, digging grave: he looks ridiculous, throwing shovelfulls of earth into messy pile next to LILY and her MOTHER.
LILY
Watch my momma’s roses, hey!
MICKEYl
I can’t even… I can’t even…
LILY
Speak? Oh. Mickey, you don’t have to speak — all you have to do is keep digging.
MICKEYl
(resting a second)
Oh, I’m digging alright… that’s what I can’t even… I can’t believe that I’m actually doing this…
LILY and LILY’S MOTHER stare at him, smiling:
LILY
Oh, Mickey! I believe it! And my momma and I are just so thankful for it, too. We really don’t know what we would have done if you wouldn’t have stayed the night to help us out like this.
MICKEYl
I still don’t get it — this is all too weird — I really wanted to stay over and all, but not this way, I guess. We should call the cops! We should stop all this, and just call the cops!
MICKEYl tosses shovel.
LILY rushes up to him, hugging him close.
LILY’S MOTHER starts to eat a confection. dabs cheeks.
LILY
(whispering into MICKEY1’s ear)
Now, my little date. You know what would happen if we did that, don’t you? You know what would happen if we told the police?
MICKEYl
(whispering back)
Yeah, I know. I’d probably never see you again… I’d probably end up in the slam even before you did …
LILY
But you believe me, don’t you? You believe what I told you, how it happened, how innocent I am?
MICKEYl
Yeah, I guess I do.
LILY hugs MICKEY1 close, head on his shoulder, caressing his ear.
MICKEY1
(puppy dog face)
All I want is a girlfriend. you know. I came back from college just so excited. but things just haven’t been working out for me.
LILY
Oh, I know, dear, oh. I know…
MICKEYl
I can’t find a decent job, all my friends have gone, no one seems to like me anymore, and when I finally get a date with a great chick, I arrive only to feed her ugly baby, walk into a bloody stiff that’s fallen out of her closet, watch some guy bolt out her bedroom window… Then eat cookies with her momma until 4am, and spend the next morning digging a grave. No wonder people watch “The Dating Game” on TV!
LILY
(rocking him back and forth)
I understand, Mickey, I understand how you feel…
Close up MICKEYl’s head resting on LILY’S shoulder, as she continues to rock him.
Grave in background, farther off, BODY.
MICKEYl
I’ve dated so many women in school, usually just a Saturday night thing, drive-in stuff, but I have to admit that I’ve never met anyone quite like you…
LILY
I know, Mickey, oh, I know…
Zoom in BODY, in death still so similar to MICKEYl in life.
EXT — GRAVEYARD, ACROSS SOME HEDGES:
Close up MICKEY2’s face, wearing cheap sunglasses, black fedora, smoking cigarette.
He sits near hedges in cemetery behind LANGER house, MICKEYl digging grave on one side, WORKMEN digging another in cemetery proper.
Three groups of women sit around grave: cheerful to left, angry to right, sad in middle.
LOIS (in LEFT GROUP)
Lonna! What in hell are you doing here?
LONNA (in RIGHT GROUP)
Lois! What in heaven’s name are you doing here?
LETICIA (in CENTER GROUP)
Lonna! Lois! What on earth are you two doing here?
LEFT GROUP
(all standing, waving)
We’re all the women who used Mickey Moskavitz!
RIGHT GROUP
(all standing, waving)
And we’re all the women who were used by Mickey Moskavitz!
CENTER GROUP
(all standing, waving)
And we’re all the women who loved Mickey Moskavitz, and were loved by Mickey just the same — only things didn’t work- but we still kept in touch.
All women shrug in unison, simultaneously sit down.
MlCKEY2
(to himself)
Well, I guess ya win some, ya lose some — and ya miss all the rest.
EXT — LANGER ROSEGARDEN:
Close up of BODY’s (MARTY’S) face throughout, with off-screen voice overs:
VOICE OF MICKEYl
What did I do to deserve this?-Tell me God, what did I do to deserve this?
VOICE OF LILY
You complain too much. You get what you get, because you complain too much.
Shovelful of dirt strikes BODY’s face.
VOICE OF MICKEY1
I can’t even look at this!
VOICE OF LILY’S MOTHER
(consolingly, in motherly tone)
Then don’t look, Mickey dear, then don’t look.
More dirt strikes face, until completely covered with dirt.
Cut to long shot of MICKEYl leaning on shovel, LILY smoking cigarette, and LILY’S MOTHER eating.
LILY’S MOTHER approaches MICKEYl.
LILY’S MOTHER
Would you like a little something to eat?
MICKEYl
What do you have in mind?
LILY’S MOTHER
Would you like a little bacon, some eggs? A nice English breakfast?
MICKEYl
I’m not English.
LILY’S MOTHER
(pats MICKEY1, dabs cheeks)
Oh, that’s perfectly alright, little Mickey! You can still eat, can’t you? Oh, you must be so hungry after working so hard. Come back inside. Let me fix you a little something. How about some coffee?-
MICKEYl gazes at LILY’S MOTHER, staring at her as blankly as stiff did when above ground:
MICKEYl
Caw-fee. Caw-fee.
MICKEYl ‘s mouth drops, he collapses backward.
MICKEYl caught by LILY and MOTHER, who drag him into house.
EXT — GRAVEYARD:
Ceremony begins, with PRIEST giving boring durge.
One woman in RIGHT GROUP, in short black hair, pearly catglasses, wearing a long jet black dress, notices MICKEY2. She stands, walks toward hedge.
VOICE OF MICKEY2
Have you come to pay your respect to the dead, dearest Lola?
Tall woman looks surprised for tenth of second, lights cigarette.
LOLA
I didn’t know that the dead spoke to the living.
VOICE OF MICKEY2
I didn’t know that the living spoke to the dead.
LOLA
Only when the dead might have something interesting to say.
VOICE OF MICKEY2
Try them.
LOLA finds MICKEY2, lying in grass. looking up at her.
LOLA
You know, smoking is very bad for you.
MICKEY2
Yeah, but I’m dead, so I don’t have to worry about shit like that. You’re the one who should be worried.
LOLA
Oh, I’m not worried — just a little bit surprised.
MICKEY2
You miss me?
LOLA
I don’t know. I did back there (gesturing to burial ceremony), but I’m not so sure now.
MICKEY2
I’ve been sure, sure of you, sure that if things got rough, I could count on you — I need a place to stay.
LOLA
You’re dead. You have a place to stay. That’s why everyone’s here today.
MICKEY2
Yeah, I know — and that’s why you have to hide me.
LOLA
I don’t have to worry about that. You have qualified professionals here to see you off.
MICKEY2
Those guys can’t do dick for me. Just like all those women can’t.
LOLA
So you think that I can?
MICKEY2
You always did.
LOLA
That was part of the problem, wasn’t it?
MICKEY2
(apologetically)
I had to leave. You knew that. I had no choice.
LOLA
You could have at least told me something, given me some word you were leaving, shown some respect —
MICKEY2
I’m sorry. Does that help?
LOLA
No: it never does. (Pause) How come you’re not in the box?
MICKEY2
Technically, I am.
LOLA
(kicks MICKEY2 slightly)
Seem pretty alive to me.
MICKEY2
(Coughs)
Long story.
LOLA kicks him in stomach again.
MICKEY2
(Coughs again, shakes himself)
Okay, okay — I think that Mort’s guy Beauregard accidentally got a hold of my ID during a heist we pulled last night — I think he got burned, bad, in this explosion, and now those jokers think that I bit the dust, not him.
LOLA
Beauregard!? Then little Beau’s dead?
MICKEY2
So sad? Would you rather it have been me?
LOLA
Beauregard? (Pause, mood shift) Are you working for Mort, you bastard —
MICKEY2
Look. I’m in a compromised position, Babe. Just like I was then, before I left, four years ago. Mort gave me the job, I took it. Willy’s your uncle. I know, but what could I do? (Pause) Do you want me back around or not? — If not, I can understand, but I need your help now — Can you do that for me?
MICKEY2 holds arm out. LOLA lies down on grass next to him.
LOLA
Why did you have to come back into my life?
MICKEY2
I never left. Babe.
LOLA
And now. now that you’re here. I know you could never come back to stay.
MICKEY2
Neither here nor there.
LOLA
I used to fantasize about you being dead. I thought everything would be so much easier that way. Now you’re dead, and things seem even more complicated. Where did I go wrong?
MICKEY2
The dead make life worth living.
LOLA
May you rest in peace, Mickey Moskavitz. May you rest in peace — so that the rest of us can, too.
DAY 7: INT — BISTRO DINING ROOM, early morning following burial:
Sun brightly coming through window, LILY, MICKEYl, at booth, both very tired.
MICKEYl is covered in grit, a mess.
LULU
(false, mocking enthusiasm)
Well, good morning, Mickey Moskavitz. Bright and early, I see. Trouble sleeping? (looking wickedly at LILY, then back at MICKEY1) Trouble with the personal hygiene, rat face?
MICKEYl dabs napkin into glass of ice water, cleans hands.
MICKEYl
When do you not work here?
LULU tosses bundle of napkins onto table.
LULU
I work five shifts that’s all but the new girt Roxie had a fight with her new boyfriend and threw him out and is all upset even though I told her he was no good but she wouldn’t listen to me she never listens to me I work only five shifts but this week I have six well seven realty if you count this one all by myself all alone on the floor but I can handle it because-
MICKEYl
Can we both have a splash of coffee, please?
LULU goes running, crying to bathroom.
MICKEYl starts playing with silverware. LILY seems to have taken up origami.
MICKEYl
Have you ever slept with a woman?-
LILY
Have you?
MICKEYl
Have you ever killed a man?
LILY
Only one I would never otherwise sleep with.
MICKEYl
How could you ever kill someone?
LILY
How could you ever ask such a question? Besides, how do you know it was me?
MICKEYl
What was the body doing in your own bedroom closet then, dead and bloody?
LILY
And you call yourself an artist!
MICKEYl
Who?
LILY
A pictures hangs in someone’s room — what does that tell you about the picture, the room, the person who hangs it there? A picture hangs in someone’s room — does that imply that the person who hung it there actually painted it? That they even knew the artist personally? Or that they even have a clue as to what that picture even means? —
MICKEYl
Right. But what the hell does all that have to do with the stiff in your closet?! What was he doing in there, sniffing your panties?
LILY perks up for first time, faint smile crossing her lips.
LILY
Phew! Your artistic inclinations haven’t been altogether killed off!
MICKEYl
I’m sorry. I’m not sure what came over me.
LILY
That’s alright. I don’t keep my panties in the closet — only murdered boyfriends.
MICKEYl
So you did kill him!
MICKEYl looks back and forth across the restaurant, nervously back at LILY.
LILY finishes origami napkin project, and she tosses a convincing, long-necked bird with large wings in front of MICKEYl.
LILY
(staring at him, disappointed)
Of course I killed him, you little twirp! Blood dripping from the walls, his guts still warm when he tumbled out…
MICKEYl winces, total nausea crossing face. MICKEY1 grabs handful of napkins, presses against his mouth.
LULU shows up, two mugs, pot of fresh, steaming coffee.
She places mugs down, pours, tossing creamers.
LULU peers at MICKEY1.
LULU
(smirking)
You must feel as bad as you look.
MICKEY
(through napkin gauze)
Do you work alone because you need the work, or because you’re just alone?
LULU walks away, sobs trailing behind her.
LILY
Now that wasn’t very nice, was it?
MICKEYl
I’m not in the mood for old loves — or new.
LILY
Do you love me already?
MICKEYl
Why? So you can kill me, too?
LILY looks down, truly self-conscious, perhaps for the first time.
MICKEYl plays with the origami bird, holding it with one hand, index finger, thumb on neck, other hand, pinching tail, pulling and pushing, making wings flap.
LILY
(looking up sombrely)
You’re already dead.
MICKEYl
(drops bird upside down onto table)
Excuse me?
LILY
(fear in her eyes)
At least that’s what They think.
MICKEYl
They? They? Who’s They?
LILY
Thought you had your hands full with only little old me and my little old lady, eh?
MICKEYl
Are you crazy? I mean, are you really this fucked up, or is your momma’s high-cholesterol English breakfast starting to affect me?
LILY
Why? Do you date only crazy women?
MICKEYl
We aren’t dating.
LILY
Why? Don’t I fit your bill? Am I not good enough? Would your mother not approve?
MICKEYl
Don’t ask me any more questions.
LILY
You started this.
MICKEYl
What are we going to do now?
LILY
We already did our parts.
MICKEYl
What do you mean?
LILY
I killed him, and you got rid of the body.
MICKEYl
But you, if I got this right, killed the wrong guy. I might be clueless, but I’m not stupid — and that guy looked just like me! You set me up, only something happened, and you killed him instead!
LILY
Are you complaining about that, too?
MICKEYl
No. Never mind. (Pause) What are we going to do?
LILY
You already asked me that question.
MICKEYl
Yeah, but you didn’t answer it.
LILY
Do you still want to sleep with me?
MICKEYl
You’re changing the subject!
LILY
That’s because the previous subject doesn’t interest me — Sleeping with you, that interests me.
MICKEYl
For the same reason you killed me?
LILY
(softly, seductively)
Yes.
LILY takes napkin, dabs it in ice water, cleans MICKEYl ‘s hands, as MICKEYl looks confusedly on.
MICKEYl raises finger.
MICKEYl
What about the other guy?
LILY
Which other guy?
MICKEYl
The guy who jumped out of your bedroom window.
LILY
Ohl Him. You don’t know him?
MICKEYl
No. Should I?
LILY
You two actually have some things in common.
MICKEYl
What? Who? You?
LILY
(raising a finger)
Another splash of coffee please! (to MICKEY 1) So tell me — you jealous? What exactly is on your mind?
MICKEYl
I’m confused, frightened, exhausted, lonely, depressed, sleepy, sexually frustrated —
LILY
Don’t be frightened, little Mickey, don’t be afraid.
LILY smiles, reaches under table, plops rolled canvas in front of MICKEYl.
MICKEYl
My painting? What’s it doing here? And why?
LILY
Lost loves help you find some things, you know — have some faith, little Mickey. I’m tired of this kind of life, they say murderesses grow old in jail or die polishing their steak knives/ Woman like me, hell, I should be able to try new things, make a career switch, what do you think?
MICKEYl
But what can we do? What’s going on? How can we get ourselves out of this?
LILY
(pointing to painting)
Just hang onto this, will you, Dear? Hide it someplace safe. We can set things right — trust me.
MICKEYl
Trust you?
LILY
Of course. Now let me tell you what’s going on…
DAY 7: MOSKAVITZ HOUSE, MICKEY’S BEDROOM, around noon:
Close up of mural: stylistic hodge-podge, piggly-wiggly study in undergraduate artschool ecclecticism and naivete: Keith Haring stick figures dancing around a cubist fire, Paul Klee catheads floating in Joan Miro sky, Picasso women standing under Daliesque baroque archways, smoking cigarettes glued to canvas Julian Schnabel style, minus antlers.
The mural is smeared in places with ash, dangling cigarettes soaked with water, still dripping. House painter’s roller red washes over the mural. One corner is painted over, then another, closing in toward center.
MICKEY2 wears black body suit heavily smeared with red paint. Printed across its back are stenciled letters “SPLATTER BROS.”
MICKEY2 breaks intact cigarette off mural, lights it.
MICKEY2 finishes red-washing mural. Peers through sliver in door, turns place upside down. MICKEY2 removes drawers, rifles through clothing — then works on furniture, running fingers along sides, over edges, checking for secret locations, hidden drawers, hollow chair legs, false panels.
THE KID, perched on shelf, rips page out of a book, yells down.
THE KID
(sarcastically, effeminately)
Oh! I guess I’m the lucky one. Look! I found them, see? Aren’t they byoo-tee ful? Aren’t the two of them just grand?
THE KID tosses leaf of soaked paper to ground. Close up: soaked and soiled photograph of Degas’ ‘Two Dancers On Stage.”
MICKEY2
Why don’t you take a running swan dive off that thing? Here (pointing to photo): aim for the pretty ballerina. You can both die together.
THE KID
You’re the ladies’ man, jailbird. You might as well have some fun with that mouldy rendition, since we’re never gonna find the real thing up here.
MICKEY2
Real thing? Why don’t you have a coke and a smile? We’re looking for the fake, remember? It’s gotta be back here with the little art twirp again — have ya got any better ideas, chiselhead?
THE KID
(starts down shelf)
Well, if you wouldn’t keep losing the damn thing, we’d be in business.
MICKEY2
Hey, wasn’t my fault my old flame’s back to whacking boyfriends.
THE KID
No excuse, Romeo. From what I hear, now you’ve got Willy and Mort after you, old boss and new. Good work!
THE KID reaches floor, props up art tome.
THE KID
Old painting and new?
Close up: self-portrait of Degas.
THE KID grins, face next to it.
VOICE OF MICKEYl suddenly heared below.
MICKEY2 and THE KID dart for cover.
INT — MOSKAVITZ LIVING ROOM:
Place is also a mess: soaked carpet, smoky stains on walls, candles for lighting, wrecked furniture.
MANNY MOSKAVITZ trudges into view, lugging large television set.
After him runs MINNIE MOSKAVITZ carrying large breakfast tray, crammed with makeshift meal.
MINNIE
Manny! Manny! Are you crazy? Look what you are doing! Do you ever look what you are doing!?- You are going to kill yourself, Manny! Manny! Can’t you hear what I am saying to you?! Don’t you ever listen to me, Manny?! What is wrong with you?
MANNY
(exasperated, tired)
Give me a break, will ya?
MANNY MOSKA VITZ sweats profusely, puts down TV set with “thunk” and slouches against it.
MANNY
Bad enough that I have to carry this thing, what with you yelling at me — the whole way, tool What is wrong with me? — What is wrong with you, huh?
MINNIE
That set’s too heavy for you! Why didn’t you get Mickey to help you, or better, that handyman you hired to help us clean up? Why do you have to do everything yourself, and everything all wrong?
MANNY
I don’t trust either of them! One is my own worthless son. The other is this no good house painter who —
MINNIE
Shhhh! They are both here, cleaning up! What kind of a graduation present do we welcome our dearest little Mickey baby home with? And what kind of people are we, to treat the help so poorly? You are ungrateful! That is what you are! Ungrateful! Ungrateful, and always complaining!
MANNY
I complain because I have every right to complain. I complain because complaining is the only way to describe most of this stinking world we live in. And what do you say? Poorly? I treat them poorly? I pay the bum twice as much as he’s worth, and half as much as I’d pay that college boy son of ours, if only he would do something with his life, which he doesn’t because he is a no good bum artist!
MANNY sets up television.
MANNY
What kind of a son do we have? Can you tell me that? How much did I pay for his college? And what did we get in return?
MINNIE
(pushing tray at MANNY)
Eat! Eat! Shut up and eat!
MANNY
I don’t wanna eat that junk! You get it? I don’t wanna eat it. I wanna retire! I want that no good lazy schmuck of a kid to figure the hell out what is going on in this world!
MINNIE
Don’t be so harsh on him. You know what we went through when we were his age, and even younger. You know our struggles, what we had to do during the War. (Pause) Some of the things we had to do just to survive. (Pause) Let him be, Manny, let him find himself — all of us will be happier for it.
MANNY
Happy!? Twenty years in the factory, two emigrations, and all for what? For who?
MANNY looks at MINNY with exhaustion and fear, pushes tray away.
MANNY
Minnie! Plug the TV in for me, Minnie!? (throwing down food) And make me a decent meal!
MINNIE
What’s happened to us, Manny? What’s happened to the whole family?- Something’s happened. something, something’s happened —
MANNY
Shut up! I want to watch the tetevison now-
MANNY rolls eyes, stares blankly into televison set.
INT — MICKEY’S BEDROOM:
Point of view through crack in closet of MICKEYl and OLD MAN, cleaning up bedroom. They stoop over. pick up bundles of soiled clothing, rearrange furniture. Reverse view of MICKEYl and OLD MAN, continuing to clean.
Destroyed mural looms in background.
MICKEYl
Look at this place! Can you believe it? What’s wrong with those firemen? Civil servants! That’s the problem! Puppets of the state! They aren’t independent, like us artists, huh? They have no respect for things, no respect for art!
OLD MAN
That’s right. That’s very right, son. No respect. A real shame. If they’d only appreciate the fine classics of Extortionist Art —
MICKEY l
Impressionist. Impressionist art.
OLD MAN
A real shame. If they’d only appreciate the fine classics of Impressionistic art, they would know better than to smear red paint on an entire wall of —
MICKEYl
Aaaaaaaaaaaaaahl Noway! Aaaaaaaaaaaaaah!
MICKEYl hugs ex-mural, rocks himself against it, red paint smearing all over him.
In background, MICKEY2 and THE KID sneak out of the closet and exit the room.
MICKEYl
Aaaaaaaaah! Aaaaaaaaah! — Ooh.
INT — MOSKAVITZ BATHROOM:
Close up hands being washed. Red paint washes down sink.
THE KID
We find it?
MICKEY2
See for yourself.
THE KID unrolls canvas, only to find doodles and sketches.
THE KID
Hey! I was hoping this would be my Van Halen poster!
MICKEY2
Shit. Now we’re going to have to follow the twirp.
THE KID
You’re still convinced the broad gave the pix back?
MICKEY2
Oh, yeah — I know my murderesses.
THE KID
Do they wear dresses?
MICKEY2
I’m gonna smack you.
THE KID
Necessary discipline?
MICKEY2
No- pain — pain, plain and simple-
THE KID
(Pointing frantically to the door)
Hide!
MICKEY2 and THE KID leap into bathtub, slide curtain.
MICKEYl enters bathroom, starts to wash hands, face, exposed parts. As he reaches for towel, he notices rolled canvas left on ground.
He dries hands, reaches down, lifts it up, and unrolls it.
MICKEYl scratches head, rolls canvas back up, careful not to stain it with paint on clothing.
MICKEYl exits.
MICKEY2 and THE KID then exit and follow.
INT — MOSKAVITZ HOUSE BASEMENT:
Up long, narrow concrete staircase.
Darkness, then door at end opens, silhouette of MICKEYl.
MICKEYl trudges down stairs with rolled canvas and flashlight. F
ollow MICKEYl to basement full of stained and burned suburban family junk, then to trap door.
MICKEYl opens door, and descends.
MICKEYl climbs down to long, mildewy subterranean corridor, ash stains and get denser, at far end is large, open iron door, burn holes on face.
MICKEYl enters vault. MICKEYl clears away ashes, burned paper and wood.
He finally exposes steel box, unlocks it, places doodle and sketch canvas inside, accidentally knocks photos down and onto floor.
Close up: weathered photos, fifty years old.
MICKEYl examines photos: many are family pictures, various settings, while one photo grabs attention, he separates from rest.
Close up: this photo, that of teenage woman, fancifully locked in pirouette, wearing ostentatious ballerina’s dress. Photo is odd, strangely incongruous, in that immedlately behind ballerina is an open window, broken in places, beyond which is city in ruins, rubble everywhere, flames, smoke.
FLASHBACK: ROOM WITHIN A CITY IN POLAND, CIRCA 1944:
Photo turns to life, thick block smoke in distance rises, flash in room goes off, dancing ballerina nearly collapses against broken window.
Laughter heard, these sounds, like visuals, are all muffled here, as if through a filter, as if seen through a dream.
Laughter gradually subsides as man in S.S. uniform, jet block, with leather straps, boots, approaches her. She turns her head away from him, dolly back to encompass entire room: crates ore stacked in for comers, loose pieces of art stacked against and on top of them.
Several similarly dressed German officers direct workers as art work is packed up and shipped out of room. Photographer responsible for photo examines his camera.
Explosions, much shouting can be heard in distance.
As SS OFFICER reaches to touch her, she sobs and runs. Point of view from other room, TEEN runs toward camera, past the photographer, followed by SS OFFICER. TEEN runs to far comer, sees she has nowhere left to run, collapses there.
SS OFFICER approaches her slowly, kneels next to her. He studies her, almost indifferently, then delicately pulls dark hair away from face.
Close up: she stares up at him with fear and shame — she’s a young, frightened MINNIE.
More explosions, much shouting off-screen.
Another OFFICER rushes in, barks several incomprehensible sentences in German. SS OFFICER waves messenger off.
Dolly in as he stands up slowly. He reaches into uniform, removes wad of paper money, tosses ff onto MINNIE’S tap.
MINNIE, upon seeing money, starts to cry.
SS OFFICER exits.
Pause.
SS OFFICER returns, hands MINNIE small roll of film, rolled canvas. SS OFFICER again exits.
Explosion rocks building.
Point of view into other room: WORKER is about to place a canvas into crate, accidentally drops painting. Two OFFICERS rush up, strike him repeatedly. WORKER collapses. OFFICER repeatedly shoots hapless WORKER: chest area soaked wffh blood.
Close up: MINNIE’s face, tears streaming down cheeks.
BACK REAL TIME: INT — BASEMENT MOSKAVITZ HOUSE, INNER VAULT:
Close up: MINNIE, tears streaming down cheeks.
MINNIE
Mickey! Little Mickey! Are you alright? Are you okay?
MICKEYl, collapsed in front of steel box, slowly regains consciousness, MINNIE leans over him, dabs face with wet towel.
MINNIE
What happened to you? Tell me what happened!
MICKEYl shakes head, slowly props himself up. He looks down at shirt, soaked and still wet with red paint.
MICKEYl
Somethlng’s happened. Mom — I must have taken a bad fall.
MICKEYl looks about, and he finds only doodles and sketches.
MICKEY1 hears from distance. in childish. teasing, whiny tone:
“Mi-ckey, Mi-ckey Mos-ka-vitz! Mi-ckey! Can you hear me, Mi-ckey? Mi-ckey, can you hear me? Mi-ckey Mos-ka-vitz. Mi-i-i-i-cky, can you h-h-h-h-hear me? — Mi-ckey!”
Continued in Part 4…
